The top 8
Reasons I know I’ve had too much to drink
8. I have urinated on myself
7. I am completely lost in a foreign place and it takes me two hours to get home
6. I am in Palmerston North and I spend two hours trying to find my way home
5. I am frothing at the mouth
4. I spill my drink (surprisingly I hardly ever do this)
3. I have passed out by 7pm
2. I completely fail to recognise that a hot girl is hitting on me
1. It’s 3pm Tuesday at work and I still can’t see properly
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The top 8
Moments from Murf A Palooza
8. Using masking tape to not only erect a gazebo but also to fix Browny’s leg.
7. Dancing with a thundercat doll in Diablos.
6. Wilz trying to hook up with as many girls as possible.
5. The amount of beer consumed by Browny, Heps, Pumba and myself before people starting showing up.
4. The Death Mix being moved from room to room because everyone wanted some.
3. Heps on the roof trying to take on everyone in the traditional Palooza lemon fight.
2. Heps spinning a yard glass around on his hand then stabbing the birthday boy with it when it broke.
1. The man himself showing up. Mohammed.
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The top 8
Moments from the weekend that was Return 2 Palooza
8. Chasing cars down the road naked.
7. The drunken back neighbour smashing his way through the corrogated iron fence at 10am to drink beverages with us.
6. The lemon fight. Half of the crew on the back neigbours lawn, half on our lawn.
5. Heps, his cell phone, and spending $250 on his credit card Friday night on various shots of liquers at China Inn.
4. Helping some random Maori kid with a stab wound at 3.30am on Saturday morning whilst his mates go about stealing Pumba’s car from down the driveway.
3. The fire brigade showing up to put out a “small” fire on the lawn and Heps trying to run in the way of the water jet from the fire hose.
2. Borrowing the hockey females table early Saturday morning and telling them we will return it in “about an hour”. Then returning it to them Sunday morning in burnt pieces.
1. Whitley and his full-body green leotard after multiple attempts running through another neighbours corrogated fence.
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The top 8
Excuses to give your boss on Monday as to why you’re late.
8. You think you might have caught an STI on Saturday night and wanted to get yourself checked out.
7. Your friend was arrested on Sunday night for public urination after a “Sunday Session”. He required picking up from the Police Station as he was still in no state to walk anywhere.
6. Things got a little crazy on Saturday night and you woke up in a “unfamiliar” city on Sunday afternoon. The trip back took longer than expected.
5. You realised that when you got to work you had no pants on and had to drive back home to get some.
4. You decided to skip the first couple of hours of work “‘coz you only spent that time surfin’ the net anyways”.
3. You thought that someone was following you so you wanted to “lose” them. You then realised it was your flatmate and she was trying to give you your lunch which you forgot.
2. You don’t actually give your boss an excuse. You sit down at your desk and start working like you have been there all morning. Your boss is perplexed.
1. You got your car stuck on the front lawn of your workplace. The police are investigating.
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